We just had an interesting get-together with a friend of a friend. Some backstory…Our mutual friend had told this person, Cat, that we had made some major life changes and that it had all started when we had decided to take several months off from life-as-we-knew-it in order to do some volunteering and exploring in South America.
As it turns out, Cat has been longing to do something similar. Ten years into a career, she has had the time to sort out her values in the process of figuring out what really matters to her. She knows one thing for sure, she wants to break away from her routine in order to lean into her desire to do something altruistic. More specifically, she wants to volunteer for several months in South America to gain a new perspective and to do something that contributes to a better world. Sounds familiar.
Talking to Cat, we learned a lot about her primary concerns. Here are the biggies: For starters, she is terrified to walk away – even if only for a few months – from her promising career. She has the “what will I come home to” jitters. Also, she has no idea where to begin from a planning perspective. Add to that the fact that she is surrounded by people who are telling her that she is crazy – people who are saying that only early twenty-somethings (and life-long slackers) do that sort of thing. In addition to letting her know that she’s hanging around with the wrong people, we had much to share.
To be honest, we went through much the same process. 80% of people suggested we were out of our minds for not wanting to subscribe to the notion of a cookie-cutter life. We connect with a lot of people who share Cat’s dilemma. People who want to do things a bit differently, but who don’t know quite where to start. Does this sound at all like you?
First off, a dose of armchair psychology. Don’t let anyone tell you how to define your goals or your success. If you want to do something off the beaten path, you may not find a lot of people who stand up and clap. Cat, who is in her early thirties, is a manager with a software company. As you’d expect, her circle includes similarly employed people and a family with high expectations. You can imagine how it went when, one day at happy hour, she said “I’m thinking I want to hit the road for about a year to do some volunteering in South America. What do you all think?!” She laughs about it now but says that the silence was brutal.
Thus the coffee date with us, her new de-facto cheerleaders.
The point is pretty obvious. Live your own life. Be brave (but not irresponsible). Lean into a bit of uncertainty, and you might just be blown away by how things end up. Some friends/family might be jealous, angry and judgmental. They’ll get over it.
Don’t let the details overwhelm you. Take a first step. This blog is a perfect place to connect with people who might just be the inspiration that you need. Also, Idealist’s website is chock full of fantastic ways to learn and share.
Latest posts by wearekandc
- Reality Check Via a Credit Card - January 15th, 2010
- Here's to Courage - December 11th, 2009
- International Volunteer Day - December 4th, 2009
- From South America to Samoa - November 27th, 2009
- Take Action in NYC: Mercy Corps - November 6th, 2009
- 5 Surprises About International Volunteering: #5 - We're All Connected - October 21st, 2009
- Help Keep the World Amazing: Blog Action Day 2009 - October 15th, 2009
- 5 Surprises About International Volunteering: #4 - "Wow" Moments - October 13th, 2009
- 5 Surprises About International Volunteering: #3 - Living With Less - October 1st, 2009
- 5 Surprises About International Volunteering: #2 - Language Non-Barriers - September 25th, 2009
Hi – again! Um… can I just say it was great to read this. However, now I still have some questions or thoughts I was wondering if I could drop them with you (hehe). First of all I think it is really great what Cat is doing! And I’m sorry if I’m commenting like asif you are a cheer-leader of an agony aunt for any body. It’s just when I read this blog I can see that Cat has reached a cross road in her life, and there are good and bad in each direction. I would have most certainly done what she had done. But, with me… I am currently 18 year old I left school when I was 16 (I’m not sure where you are from..but in the UK this is the correct time we leave, then it’s college for 2 years, and then university I guess is equivalent to US college level – so I wasn’t a drop-out)… Then I began college and left before finishing my A-levels. I started work as a 2nd option. Then, last year I applied for university to study Nursing (and to hopefully go into tropical medicine), so I quit my job ready to go, then suddenly I decided to wait and to go traveling, so I used my savings that were meant to be for university to go for 7 weeks volunteering in Huancayo, Perú. I have since retunred, and now I am in another job and due to start university in March 2010.
Now, when you speak about Cat’s choice she had, she had already a succesful career behind her and for when you was to return she would still be recognised for what she had achieved career-wise. The difference with me is that I have not got this behind me, and all anybody around me can see is that I didn’t finish college, I postponed starting university… and now… recently I attended the Latin American 2009 conference in London, and all these oppertunities for young people have presented themselves. And I’m stuck what to do… I think maybe I am scared to loose time as by the time I finish uni I will officially be an adult. However, I think life-experience is more important to my true aspirations in life. I actually agree that what people are thinking about my ways is true. I do need to go to university yes I know. But, there is still this huge feeling of all these oppertunities I feel are more personally valuable to me and I don’t want to change these during the tough three years as a stressed-no-time student nurse.
I’m not asking for somebody to tell me what to do… but I really would appreciate any thoughts or anybody who can relate to this that I could hear from.
I hope somebody made it to the end of this comment (I am not a great writer haha!)
Please, here is my mail: luisse@live.com
I would like to hear from anybody as a response, the great writer who wrote this blog post, anybody reading the blog post, anybody.
Oh, and incase I’m not allowed to post my email on here.. here is my facebook: http://www.facebook.com/luisses
When opening this blog (- I had my eye on it whilst reading the one’s posted previously)… I first read a comment a lady had left… I was slouching in my chair. But, as soon as I read the quote ’she is terrified to walk away – even if….’ I sat up straight. I have not read further yet… but I’m really excited as this relates exactly to the first thing in my mind!! (I will go to read the rest now – haha) Just thought I would share this.
Thanks – will do! We love connecting with others, like Cat, who want to break the mold.
Great post I am sure many people will get the encouragement they need from reading it. Funny how some people react to a person leaving the cookie cutter life behind. Please tell Cat I am cheer leading her from Belize to take her great adventure.