I expected re-entry into the US to be somewhat difficult when I came back from Ecuador.
Standard wisdom says it’s harder to come back home than it is to go abroad. Certainly that was my experience when I lived in Japan—it was difficult getting used to the tightly controlled chaos that is Tokyo. But I had no way of assessing how my experience abroad had changed me until I was back in a context where I could do a before-and-after comparison. My expectations of an easy re-entry were totally off. To put it simply: it sucked.
Based on that, you can imagine my pleasant surprise when it was easy to come back from Ecuador.
Welcome back to the States, Lizzie!
I’ve spent a week wondering, why am I not feeling confused and displaced? How have I managed to easily transition from my broken Spanglish back to English? Is my experience representative of what other volunteers feel when they come back?
And while I have been thinking this, I’ve realized there are two crucial differences between my experience in Japan and my experience in Ecuador. And a handful of reasons why my transition isn’t representative for other volunteers in South America—maybe not even representative for the majority.
First of all, I was not in Ecuador for a cultural learning experience. I was there to provide support for a nonprofit that I cared about. I did learn Spanish and interact with many people who come from a culture different than mine, but my sole purpose was not to learn ABOUT those other cultures. Learning to think in Spanish didn’t have a significant effect on my psyche. Either I didn’t put as much effort in, or it simply isn’t THAT different from thinking in English.
Second of all, the first place I went when I came back from Ecuador was my parents’ house in Cleveland. For better or for worse, Cleveland doesn’t change very quickly. Coming back to a place that is exactly how I left it makes it easy for me to shed my recent experiences and revert to a former self. Yes, I probably changed in Ecuador, but my personality changes aren’t standing between me and my current environment or the people in it.
So why is my experience not representative? Well, I think most volunteers are more profoundly involved in their experiences where they are. My particular position dealt mostly with information online and so enabled me to skim the surface of life in Ecuador. I could talk to and write about refugee clients without getting invested in their lives. This is not to say I didn’t care or didn’t feel like my relationship to them was important—it just means that because I wasn’t working with them directly on a daily basis, I did not establish long-term professional relationships with any of them.
I was also not invested in Ecuador itself. I preferred the company of other expats, and so I didn’t create significant social networks to tie me to Quito. I never learned to salsa dance and I never learned the lyrics to any reggaeton songs. I didn’t meet the girl of my dreams and fall in love, as my friends predicted I would (and some volunteers I met seemed to have done).
It seems to me like most volunteer experiences are more firmly tied to the PLACE where they happen, and that other contexts are more conducive to creating social networks that reaffirm ties to that place. And, quite possibly, that the vast majority of volunteers are much more emotionally invested in what they are doing than I was. Volunteers go abroad for a multitude of reasons that are carefully and accurately detailed throughout this blog. Volunteers are driven by idealism, passion, determination, or simply a desire for something new. By putting this emotional energy in, volunteers get something back. And that something will decide how easy re-entry is.
Kent titled his most recent post, “Nobody Teaches You How to Say Goodbye.” I think that sentiment is common for most volunteers. For me, I took a breath, opened my mouth, and said, “Ciao, Ecuador.” And that was that.
Lizzie LaCroix was most recently a Development Associate for Asylum Access in Quito, Ecuador.
Latest posts by erlacroix
- A Job Search from Abroad... - June 4th, 2010
- Day in the Life: Ecuadorian Fruit Adventures - May 28th, 2010
- A Real Love-Hate Relationship - May 21st, 2010
- The Best Country in the World? - May 17th, 2010
- Confessions of an Urban Volunteer - May 7th, 2010
- It's Been Nice, But You Can Die Now - May 3rd, 2010
- Watch Out For What, Exactly? - April 23rd, 2010
- What Does It Mean to be a Foreign Volunteer? - April 16th, 2010
