A white girl smiled at me today, and that is not as racist as it sounds.
It’s also not as common as it sounds. Yes, Xela has a fairly sizable population of gringos – and, of course, people from all races and backgrounds. The town’s high concentration of language schools and its proliferation of NGOs draws many people from more-developed nations.
Despite that, us gringos are clearly in the minority. Which is why we’re easily noticeable. Which is why it seems like we deliberately try to not look at each other.
This phenomenon hasn’t been limited to Xela. I’ve noticed it in other, non-hostel Latin America experiences. I was also guilty of it when I lived in Puerto Jimenez. If you’ve lived down here, have you noticed it (or done it)?
I have a couple theories as to why this ocular aversion occurs. Maybe it’s a fear that the other foreigner will start chatting away in English. Or that they’d start the threadbare “So, where are you from?” conversation.
But I really think it comes down to this: We who have decided to live here, be it for a few weeks or several years, really want to be a part of our adopted communities. We’re set apart enough by wearing fancy adventure clothes, cramming trendy coffee shops, and writing blogs, never mind the issues of language and skin. By locking eyes for even a second with a person who is obviously not from that community, we would acknowledge that bond of being different and send a crack through our sense of belonging.
Thinking about it, that’s a little nuts. Like a Peace Corps friend said in Costa Rica, “I could be here for 13 years and still be the extranjera.” Which isn’t necessarily bad; it just means that you’d have to accept always being different. Well, what’s one more thing?
I promise get back on the smiling-at-people (all of ‘em!) wagon, if everyone else promises to do the same. And then maybe I could write a post starting with, “A cute girl smiled at me today.”
Though I guess that’s not as common as it sounds, either.
Kent most recently left his post as an English teacher in Puerto Jimenez, Costa Rica and is currently traveling. To see what he’s up to, check out his blog or follow him on Twitter.
Latest posts by kentgreen
- The Centries: Handing Out Awards to Central America - August 9th, 2010
- Sub-juncting Myself to a Test of Generosity - August 4th, 2010
- Nobody (At Least Not Me) Knows the Trouble Guatemala's Seen - August 2nd, 2010
- We Dance If We Want To (so why don't we?) - July 26th, 2010
- Getting Schooled in Spanish Schools - July 21st, 2010
- Guatemala's REAL Danger: Not Wanting to Leave - July 19th, 2010
- Living the High Life (and not even knowing it) - July 14th, 2010
- The Devils of Panama City - July 7th, 2010
- Paging Maintenance, We Have a Crisis in Aisle 4 - July 5th, 2010
- Bye, Bye, Bias - June 30th, 2010
@Oscar – Well said. There’s a bond you can’t shake having gone through an experience like this.
@Greg – Don’t deny the great American tradition of blabbing English abroad!
Well, I just wrote a really nice comment about how your words ring true here in Sweden as well. So it isn’t just latin america. However, here we americans can blend in a little better as long as we don’t go blabbing in english at the grocery store.
Spot on. Though expats who choose to live abroad strive to consider their adopted community as home, a special bond is forged between expats because we’re all working to make this home. It’s not limited to South America, some of the closest friends I’ll ever have I lived with in Cairo.
Whew. I was worried this was something only in my head … though still curious if other people have noticed this! Spot-on observation about relationships .. thanks, Celeste.
“By locking eyes for even a second with a person who is obviously not from that community, we would acknowledge that bond of being different and send a crack through our sense of belonging.” Totally dead on. And it’s so ridiculous because expats are the people you usually end up having more longer-term bonds with. Thanks for being honest