My friend Preston and I went to a restaurant in Nashville last week, where a decidedly bored waitress decided to liven up her evening by flirting aggressively with the both of us. At some point Preston (always the wingman) tossed me a lob. “You know,” he said to the waitress, “My friend Mark just came back from two years in Ecuador.”

“Ecuador, wow…” she said. “How was that?”

I blanked. In this particular setup, my answer was supposed to be something smarmy and sensitive: “It was heartbreaking to see children in such poverty, but rewarding, too. I know that I made a difference even if I couldn’t adopt them all.” But – sorry Preston – I just couldn’t do it. How in hell do you package two years of life into an elevator pitch or cocktail conversation piece? You don’t, obviously. But here are some tips to talking about your abroad with whoever asks about it.

Write about it first. If you can find some outlet through which to digest your experiences on a personal level, it takes some of the pressure off of those conversations. You won’t feel as much need to say something profound, witty or engaging.

Be true. People can sniff out false modesty pretty quickly and know when you’re bragging about how well traveled you are. Don’t overplay or understate your experience, just say it like it is.

Pay attention! In the first few seconds of talking about your experience, you can pick out whether somebody takes interest in what you have to say. The odds are, frankly, that they don’t. But you can pick out which parts they might be interested in. Do they teach in an elementary school? Maybe they’d be curious about how classrooms work in Uganda. Are they sports fans? Maybe they’d appreciate a (short) story about your nearly getting arrested at a soccer game in Madrid.

Practice makes perfect. I learned quickly which statements or questions really drive me up the wall. So when somebody comes at me with, “You know, those people are poor but they’re so happy, aren’t they?” I’ve got a measured response at the ready. I’m also beginning put together a mental list of lighter stories so that I have some available when people are looking for ‘fun’ rather than ‘serious.’

Good luck!

But to all of you out there trying to create change but who find yourselves discouraged because (for example) it rains too much and people don’t come to meetings when it’s raining…do not give up! I have recently had the experience of starting a girl’s softball team in a town where the average response to my idea was: “that’s a boy’s sport.” But through talking to anyone who would listen, giving it a little time, waiting for the right people to lend their hand in support, I have gotten a preliminary team together of about six muchachas, even before the official city-wide meeting has happened. And they are passing the word on to their girlfriends. I have gotten the gym teachers from all three schools in town to offer their technical support and equipment. And I have even been interviewed live on the local radio station.

My advice is to get down to basics: talk. Here in Latin America it’s not about sitting in your office shooting off emails all day long. It’s about coming face to face and having a real conversation. Talk to anyone and everyone about what you want to do: at work, at the club, at the market, on the street: basically anyone who will listen. For every 100 people that you explain yourself to, there is sure to be at least one who will offer you something with which you can move forward, even if it’s just a baby step. And even if you have to take a few steps backwards, once you have the momentum, you will surely be able to make leaps and bounds.